Question - are we swingers or sex addicts?
Addiction:- habit, compulsion, dependence, need, obsession, craving, infatuation.
Allegedly, Tiger Woods & various celebs are now sex addicts, but are they?
How are they different to swing site members? They, like us, enjoy sex with people that are not their "life" partners.
Surely if Tiger & the (mostly male) celebs can be described as sex addicts, is that an indication of a societal view of sex outside a relationship & of those that inhabit sites such as S4I?
If it is, there are an awful lot of addicts in Ireland & world wide.
While the site membership may not all be actively participating; a weekend meeting of nearly 200 people over 2 days indicates there is an alternate view on what is the sexual norm & what is okay between consenting adults.
If we are addicts where do we sign up for addiction counselling?
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Swingers or Sex addicts
recent newspaper articles on sex addiction are scarey including this questionaire
Do you have a problem with sex?
Find out if you have a problem. Answer the following questions 'yes' or 'no' as honestly as you can.
1) Were you sexually abused as a child or adolescent?
2) Have you subscribed to or regularly purchased sexually explicit magazines?
3) Did your parents have problems with their sexual behaviour?
4) Do you often find yourself preoccupied with sexual thoughts?
5) Do you feel that your sexual behaviour is not normal?
6) Does your spouse (or significant other) ever worry or complain about your sexual behaviour?
7) Do you have trouble stopping your sexual behaviour when you know it is inappropriate?
8 Do you ever feel bad about your sexual behaviour?
9) Has your sexual behaviour ever created problems for you or your family?
10) Have you ever sought help for sexual behaviour that you did not like?
11) Have you ever worried about people finding out about your sexual activities?
12) Has anyone been hurt emotionally because of your sexual behaviour?
13) Are any of your sexual activities illegal?
14) Have you made promises to yourself to quit some aspect of your sexual behaviour?
15) Have you made efforts to quit a type of sexual behaviour and failed?
16) Do you have to hide some aspects of your sexual behaviour from others?
17) Have you attempted to stop some parts of your sexual activities?
18 Have you ever felt degraded by your sexual behaviour?
19) Has sex been a way for you to escape your problems?
20) When you have sex, do you feel depressed afterwards?
21) Have you felt the need to discontinue a certain form of sexual activity?
22) Has your sexual activity interfered with your family life?
23) Have you been sexual with minors?
24) Do you feel controlled by your sexual desire?
25) Do you ever think that your sexual desire is stronger than you are?
* If you answer 'yes' to 13 or more of these questions, it is likely that you have a sex addiction and should seek treatment.
The test was compiled by the UK-based Brunswick Therapy Services
I am so definitely not an addict.
with the views expressed in the papers is it any wonder we keep our hobby hidden.
If it is, there are an awful lot of addicts in Ireland & world wide.
While the site membership may not all be actively participating; a weekend meeting of nearly 200 people over 2 days indicates there is an alternate view on what is the sexual norm & what is okay between consenting adults
I don't think this is an indication of any alternate view, 200 hundred people attending a social function is not an indicator that there is...
Looking through the profiles, the volume of people on site, various preferences, various sexualities, is more of an indicator ( in my opinion anyway )...
A vast number of people use this site to explore their sexuality, and don't feel the need to participate in large meets..
Sex addiction and enjoying sex in various formats are two completely different entities, and for that reason I say bollix to the questionaire above!!
Sex God
Alan Did you not post this same ...if not a similar topic in the last few weeks?
Possibly, but due to Tiger it is in the news again, even RTE had a passing reference to sex addiction.
And a google search of Irish written articles reveals a very uninformed understanding of swinging or sex addiction.
And a google search of Irish written articles reveals a very uninformed understanding of swinging or sex addiction.
Quote by user=Titan79
Alan Did you not post this same ...if not a similar topic in the last few weeks?
Tiger Woods and many of the other celebs you talk about were all caught at cheating and being unfaithfull and maybe in a effort to safe face sought an excuse in sex addiction. You cannot compare their behavour to that of the majority of genuine people on this site, who are here with their spouse/partner or at least with their knowledge.
And a google search of Irish written articles reveals a very uninformed understanding of swinging or sex addiction.
Purely because those who write the articles Alan-Ball do so with a biased view, so naturaly people will link infidelity ect with a form of sex addiction..
If Tiger had of been an oridinary Joe Soap I doubt any of the ladies would have bedded him, he isn't a sex addict at all, he is like many a jumped up fart when it comes to nocturnal activities..
Definition of a swinger
a. To be lively, trendy, and exciting.
b. To engage freely in promiscuous sex.
c. To exchange sex partners. Used especially of married couples.
d. To have a sexual orientation toward one or both sexes.
Definition of a sex addict and tiger woods
the time since revelations of Tiger Woods' extramarital activities first surfaced, armchair psychologists have thrown around the term "sex addict" to explain the legendary golfer's behavior. And leading in to his public apology, Woods was reported to be attending a clinic to "treat" a sex addiction. But chronically hooking up with nightclub hotties on the road doesn't necessarily mean someone is addicted to sex, experts say.
Addicts' behaviors are compulsive and escalating, and continue despite negative consequences, says Sharon O'Hara, the clinical director of the Sexual Recovery Institute in Los Angeles. O'Hara, who's treated sex addicts for almost two decades, says their actions take over their minds, causing sleeplessness, anxiety, and a loss of focus at work. There's also a great sense of shame because often their behaviors go against their personal beliefs and values. This can lead to severe depression.
"Sex addicts live lives of deception," O'Hara says. When they're out seeking sex, they often enter a dissociative state, almost as if they've gone through a door into another world, she says. After their craving is satisfied, they shut the door and return to their families. "When they become concerned with keeping their second life from others, this leads to guilt."
But it can be hard to resist the temptation. The chemical changes in sex addicts' brains are the same as people with other addictions. Sex addicts continue to seek out the "high" they experience, pursuing new women and, as that novelty dies out, more women. Despite the list of alleged mistresses, O'Hara says the Woods situation doesn't sound like sex addiction. "If I had to hazard a guess, I don't think it's sex he's really after. It would appear he's seeking adoration."
