Jealousy, not something I would associate with this life style. I have been reading how some people get jealous of those they meet thru a swing site not being exclusive to them & actually meeting other people !!
Resulting in "stalking" & "bunny boiler" scenarios when the people would not agree to be exclusive.
Does that no go totally against the ethos of what this is. I can understand people having a core group of friend they may meet regularly for fun but I dont imagine it is ever anyway exclusive.
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Jealousy
Great thread Alan, it does happen a lot on sites, happened to me on another site last year..
I was chatting for a few months to a couple from Belfast, really great vibes re meeting, I got a mail one day from a woman telling me to back off, she was a good friend of theirs and if I persisted in talking or meeting them she would make my life hell on site, the woman was 50 the mind boggles as to her mentality..
Another time I had a joint profile, we were talking with a woman , suddenly she stopped mailing me only him, when I asked her what the problem was she went crazy, claiming that she was going to have him off me..lol..... weird
Warming the Bed
Swing and exclusivity would seem to be opposite in meaning. The idea that when you are swinging your not being sexually exclusive.
Jealousy is ugly but i would have imagined it to be more prevalent in couples. Especially where one member of the couple isn't really ready or committed. Swinging isn't for everyone same as mar mite sandwiches.
In the end its probably about honesty in why you are doing it in the first place. Swinging is not going to fix a broken relationship.
Yummy
Have to agree with yummymummy. secure relationship is the most important thing b4 starting in this lifestyle. First swing I looked at my wife being pleasured by another man and felt jealous for a millisecond, seeing that I was 69ing his wife at the time jealousy turned to gratitude that we both were getting the chance to explore our fantasies in a safe environment and with so many lovely people Thanks guys.
The Definition :
jealous adj
1. suspicious or fearful of being displaced by a rival,
2. envious, I was jealous of the girls who had boyfriends,
3. resulting from jealousy, my jealous tears, Late Latin zelus emulation â—‡ adv jealously
Jealousy is a part of the human condition…..all humans both men and women are prone to it…..its our nature those in relationships even more who says that they cannot be jealous or have never been jealous are deceiving themselves or trying to hide their true feelings and emotions. As mad as it seems by being jealous is a way of showing how much you care about someone and about a relationship and not wanting to lose male partner sees the female partner as a goddess (and vice versa) and doesn’t want to lose her or even feel that he will lose her….
In swinging the first definition up there is very true……it can play on the mind of partners that they will be displaced by someone I think why a lot of couples choose only to meet bi females……due to that fact id say…..(I know ill be slated for this one but its honest)
Yes swinging and jealousy are not good bedfellows …..but that can all be overcome quite easily by complete honesty and communication between something is felt that’s out of the ordinary…then sit down and talk about it…talk it through rather than letting it fester and simmer in your mind. Talking through things is will eliminate the feelings of jealousy……which can spring from a partner not feeling the centre of attention or that a rival has appeared that he would consider a threat…..it could all be a big misunderstanding too but no one knows unless its discussed between the partners
A lot of partners would become threatened if meeting the one person became more than a once or second time but that’s up to people to discuss too
A lot of couples discuss who the other is meeting if the meets are happening separately or lay down some ground rules with regards the meets but that is up to the couple themselves….
Swinging is having sex for the sake of having sex…..for physical pleasure and variety…..whereas sex within a relationship is making love and a hell of a lot more intense and deeper….
Above all we are all prone to jealousy…..the only way to overcome it is to talk through it…..communication between people solves everything 99% of the your partner know how much you care for them and that should alleviate it I think
PS :
As one who knows first hand the only thing I can say is hold my hands up and say im sorry and that I love you (you know who you are)
OK I hope im going to make sense .. jealousy doesnt come into it for me if my partner is having sex/playing with someone else , however if I see an emotional connection that I deem to be crossing the line , then its only human nature to feel some jealousy . sex and emotion 2 completley seperate scenarios that I think people can mix up , its when the lines between both get blurred that jealousy can rear its head ,
