I probably get slated for putting this up but feck here it goes im sticking my neck out.
Do any other single genuine guys find this hard work to get meet 'e been doing this now for at least nearly a year and a half on and i do find it hard work to meet the ladys been a genuine single guy.
I like to get to know people first and to treat people with respect before i meet them so the are comfortable and safe in my company id say i'm just a bit old fashioned but i find some of the Lady's get bored easily or else there to much male competition or just some are here for the chat and banter which is ok.
Going through some of the great profiles i found that a cock pic is a great turn off for most Lady's so i uploaded new pics and left the cock one out but yet again yes still been ignored i always send respectful mail and again no replies.
I'm not giving out and i no the competition is tough here between the single males esp the genuine ones i just like to know are any other guys having the same problem.
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HARD WORK
Hey Biggles, chin up, you're not alone.
Your profile looks good, you should be flying it.
We're finding it too much like hard work too, the scene really seams to have changed a lot since we started out many moons
ago. . We're fairly gobsmacked about how little attention we've got since joining to be honest, compared to other sites other years. If we didn't spend hours talking inane nonsense in the chatroom we'd have remained invisible I reckon. Think we're passed our sell-by date,lol.
Perhaps the number of genuine active people is really really tiny???
I find the only way to get noticed is the chatroom. There are so many single guys which probably email all of the ladies, that they don't read a lot of their mail as it is too much.
As I said use the chatroom. Be open, honest, witty. Don't hound any individual/couple. If they are interested they will chat with you and look at your profile. But most importantly don't string anyone along. If you have no intention of meeting, never say you will.
Well that's my tuppence worth. 
Biggles...
It can b very hard work to find someone here that fits in with your life.
I don't get hundreds of mails a day in fact I go days on end without any... :cry:
I spend a lot of time in the chat room talking... and on cam.. getting to know ppl...
I prefer it that way and it may be inane nonsense... but hey at least I get to know the person before I risk meeting them and lower the chance of it being a disaster.
I know what I like and the kind of person I like... it works for me...
Biggles you are a lovely guy I hope the girls see that... come to the meet & greets and you will be surprised at the amount of people that will b interested after they actually meet you!
Quote by gingerfire
Biggles...
It can b very hard work to find someone here that fits in with your life.
I don't get hundreds of mails a day in fact I go days on end without any... :cry:
I spend a lot of time in the chat room talking... and on cam.. getting to know ppl...
I prefer it that way and it may be inane nonsense... but hey at least I get to know the person before I risk meeting them and lower the chance of it being a disaster.
I know what I like and the kind of person I like... it works for me...
Biggles you are a lovely guy I hope the girls see that... come to the meet & greets and you will be surprised at the amount of people that will b interested after they actually meet you!
Thanks ginger i ve been to two meets back in the past and got very very with members made alot of new and great friends and i would recomend to any single guy to go to one there great fun.
But to be honest after those two meets I'm still finding quite hard to meet people i don't no maybe it's because all the guys who mess people around are making alot more harder for us genuine guys to break through i think.I think the genuine guys get tarred with the same brush of course.
Quote by Naughtygirl1
hey hey hey its just as much hard work for us girls at times, just becos you're female and got a pair of boobs doesnt mean every man wants to chat or meet up with you, or maybe its just me who finds you men hard work at times lol
Well said naughty....biggles i understand what you are saying but its just not the single lads that have a hard time getting a meet. I have found especially in the last 6 months that it is more geared towards the couples. I am here for nearly two years now and in the begining i was flying it...but a new breed has moved in..both male and female (singles) that are too afraid to meet or are just here for the titilation of being chased. Sadly i have contemplated leaving...but instead am taking a break from meeting...NOT because i don't want to meet but because of the messers i have met. I have to say since january 8 out of 10 meets have bottled it...for whatever reason...but i know the genuine ones beacause we would have worked something else out but nope...they went
This is an adult nsa site...not a creche or dating site or practical joke site...but i am actually really starting to wonder...
Quote by Naughtygirl1
hey hey hey its just as much hard work for us girls at times, just becos you're female and got a pair of boobs doesnt mean every man wants to chat or meet up with you, or maybe its just me who finds you men hard work at times lol
oh of course i know what your saying and i have great respect for that or for any opinions on the matter in the hand. but i think alot of us genuine guys are getting tarred with the same brush as the messers
Quote by worshipme
hey hey hey its just as much hard work for us girls at times, just becos you're female and got a pair of boobs doesnt mean every man wants to chat or meet up with you, or maybe its just me who finds you men hard work at times lol
Well said naughty....biggles i understand what you are saying but its just not the single lads that have a hard time getting a meet. I have found especially in the last 6 months that it is more geared towards the couples. I am here for nearly two years now and in the begining i was flying it...but a new breed has moved in..both male and female (singles) that are too afraid to meet or are just here for the titilation of being chased. Sadly i have contemplated leaving...but instead am taking a break from meeting...NOT because i don't want to meet but because of the messers i have met. I have to say since january 8 out of 10 meets have bottled it...for whatever reason...but i know the genuine ones beacause we would have worked something else out but nope...they went
This is an adult nsa site...not a creche or dating site or practical joke site...but i am actually really starting to wonder...
I know what your saying wors but ive been on the receiving end of that meself where people keep yea waiting and waiting and waiting when you put it up to them about meeting your either ignored or told sorry not open line of communication with someone if your never are interested in meeting in the first place IMO and sorry to sound harsh i just think it waste of complete time for
Have to say I completely agree with the other girls Biggles….. Its no easier for us here. In fact it's bordering on hard work at times, which of course defeats the purpose.
From talking to others I would have thought 'meet and greets' the way to go……Even if you have to travel for them. A clear plan to meet someone for a drink or a coffee without automatically expecting a notch on the bed post also goes a long way to suggesting you're genuine.
And to be honest I think there are waaaaaaaay worse sites for messers out there….. I left another site because of persistent dragging out of things/non-commitment to meets and actually being stood up!
Well, here's hoping things are better…….
Quote by neoinin78
Have to say I completely agree with the other girls Biggles….. Its no easier for us here. In fact it's bordering on hard work at times, which of course defeats the purpose.
From talking to others I would have thought 'meet and greets' the way to go……Even if you have to travel for them. A clear plan to meet someone for a drink or a coffee without automatically expecting a notch on the bed post also goes a long way to suggesting you're genuine.
And to be honest I think there are waaaaaaaay worse sites for messers out there….. I left another site because of persistent dragging out of things/non-commitment to meets and actually being stood up!
Well, here's hoping things are better…….
Thank you for your input but i just to have to be honest its 50/50 here i think and hard to weed out the messer but i hope ladys and who as ever meet in pastime had a great time or ennjoyed conversing with me in the chatroom or over mail and at the meets and i often suggest in meeting for a drink or a coffee to but often find that some girls run a mile again hope i havent offend anyone or upset anyone in putting this topic up.
Don't worry about it biggles, I myself put up same post when I first joined, the advice I got was, get noticed, say hi, go to meet and greets,basically just get out there be nice, be friendly,be honest,and don't act the dick and you,ll do just fine...rome was,nt built in a day,don't let it get you down every single male probably has or had the same problem at 1 time or another,and let's not forget the ladies,,so chin up and I'm sure you,ll be havin fun in no time.....
Quote by markgudlick
Don't worry about it biggles, I myself put up same post when I first joined, the advice I got was, get noticed, say hi, go to meet and greets,basically just get out there be nice, be friendly,be honest,and don't act the dick and you,ll do just fine...rome was,nt built in a day,don't let it get you down every single male probably has or had the same problem at 1 time or another,and let's not forget the ladies,,so chin up and I'm sure you,ll be havin fun in no time.....
cheers for that mate ah i know that been here for a while just back after a break, i think it's the most important rules in swing is to treat everybody with respect i suppose when you hand that respect out it be nice to get it back sometimes is all.
Biggles........
I don't mean to sound harsh but you've only been back a wet week and you're getting impatient??
It takes time for guys (and girls) to establish themselves on this site or any other site for that matter. You've been off site for quite a while now, a lot of people won't know you so you really need start establishing yourself all over again.
Meet and greets worked for you the last time you were on the site so get yourself to another one.....simple! You'll find an almost totally different crowd to the people that you met last year. Mingle, be yourself and hey presto.....things will start happening!
Have faith!
Mrs P xx
Quote by worshipme
hey hey hey its just as much hard work for us girls at times, just becos you're female and got a pair of boobs doesnt mean every man wants to chat or meet up with you, or maybe its just me who finds you men hard work at times lol
Well said naughty....biggles i understand what you are saying but its just not the single lads that have a hard time getting a meet. I have found especially in the last 6 months that it is more geared towards the couples. I am here for nearly two years now and in the begining i was flying it...but a new breed has moved in..both male and female (singles) that are too afraid to meet or are just here for the titilation of being chased. Sadly i have contemplated leaving...but instead am taking a break from meeting...NOT because i don't want to meet but because of the messers i have met. I have to say since january 8 out of 10 meets have bottled it...for whatever reason...but i know the genuine ones beacause we would have worked something else out but nope...they went
This is an adult nsa site...not a creche or dating site or practical joke site...but i am actually really starting to wonder...
I know what you mean there Worship, it has been my experience on here and other sites that there are lots pf people who are all talk about meeting but will always cancel at the last moment for whatever reason. Am finding it's putting me off as well to be honest.
i think nearly all genuine blokes that are on here would say more less the same thing biggles,to behonest kinda giving up on the meeting thing because it does seem to be more geared towards couples and probably a bit of an inner circle,i must take responsebility for me own failures cos i havnt exactly got a great record at meet n greets,thats mainly down to the nerves taking over,at this stage having paid membership for the year i reckon i`m best off just seeing it out
Quote by dowhatever
i think nearly all genuine blokes that are on here would say more less the same thing biggles,to behonest kinda giving up on the meeting thing because it does seem to be more geared towards couples and probably a bit of an inner circle,i must take responsebility for me own failures cos i havnt exactly got a great record at meet n greets,thats mainly down to the nerves taking over,at this stage having paid membership for the year i reckon i`m best off just seeing it out
Am thinking along the same lines to be honest I have nearly given up on meeting people from here for the most part but there's a part of me that's still the optimist!!!
The site at present at least seems very much geared up towards couples and maybe single women also which is fine I've nothing against that at all and I'm not complaining about it am just saying that's just the way things are and it will never change realistically.
For example in the past a lot of the parties on here tended to have the line either at the end or somewhere else "no single males" just to note btw I'm only talking about the ones that are advertised now as that's my only point of reference and again people have their own reasons for that are perfectly valid and I don't feel I can say anything against as everyone who organizes something like that has the right to decide who is on the guest list and who isn't but it makes it hard for single guys as they often get put into the category of the "dreaded single male" regardless of that fact that they are really sound people & I would acknowledge as well that some guys for example who talk about going and then bottle it and don't show up probably make it so that people often don't want to take the chance and invite guys at all.
Quote by TheStig11
I have nearly given up on meeting people from here for the most part but there's a part of me that's still the optimist!!!
Well Stig show more optimism and maybe you will be invited to parties. I dont want to sound harsh, but it seems every post you publish has an air of negativity in it.
At certain points throughout our tenure here I have taken the same approach as you, and to be totally straight on the matter, it was the most detrimental thing I could ever have done. And what made me see my errors I hear you ask. Well a good friend, actually a few good friends were kind enough to tell me point blank to my face that nobody wants a grouch at a party, nobody wants the atmosphere to be hampered & reigned in by someone who isnt happy, or who at least doesnt seem to be a fun person to be around
All parties are supposed to be fun, not just the swing parties, but all parties. Show some of your good side, keep your negative thoughts to yourself, be courteous, friendly, appreciative, and above all else try to show some wit and make the girls laugh, even if it means theyre laughing at you.
Would it be such a big deal if they laugh at you, while at the same time you brush it off and laugh along too? At least that will show them that you dont take yourself too seriously and Im sure that somewhere along the way you will be lucky enough to be invited to somebodys party.
And for the record, all the best parties have a mix of couples, single girls & single guys. Trust me on that one, I speak from experience, and Im sure a lot of the people on here would agree with me.
That notion of "The dreaded single guy" is so old and outdated. We have met many many single guys at parties that deserved to attend, and it's because they dont bitch and moan but rather work hard at getting themselves known in chat, at M&G's and by not taking this site or themselves too seriously.
I wish you the best in your endeavours Stig.
Quote by Sugarloaf
I have nearly given up on meeting people from here for the most part but there's a part of me that's still the optimist!!!
Well Stig show more optimism and maybe you will be invited to parties. I dont want to sound harsh, but it seems every post you publish has an air of negativity in it.
At certain points throughout our tenure here I have taken the same approach as you, and to be totally straight on the matter, it was the most detrimental thing I could ever have done. And what made me see my errors I hear you ask. Well a good friend, actually a few good friends were kind enough to tell me point blank to my face that nobody wants a grouch at a party, nobody wants the atmosphere to be hampered & reigned in by someone who isnt happy, or who at least doesnt seem to be a fun person to be around
All parties are supposed to be fun, not just the swing parties, but all parties. Show some of your good side, keep your negative thoughts to yourself, be courteous, friendly, appreciative, and above all else try to show some wit and make the girls laugh, even if it means theyre laughing at you.
Would it be such a big deal if they laugh at you, while at the same time you brush it off and laugh along too? At least that will show them that you dont take yourself too seriously and Im sure that somewhere along the way you will be lucky enough to be invited to somebodys party.
And for the record, all the best parties have a mix of couples, single girls & single guys. Trust me on that one, I speak from experience, and Im sure a lot of the people on here would agree with me.
That notion of "The dreaded single guy" is so old and outdated. We have met many many single guys at parties that deserved to attend, and it's because they dont bitch and moan but rather work hard at getting themselves known in chat, at M&G's and by not taking this site or themselves too seriously.
I wish you the best in your endeavours Stig.
Not being negative Sugarloaf just being realistic, if you want to read my post and take it as me being negative in someway or if you want take it as me bitching or moaning that's your own business and you're entitled to express your opinions also.
I did say in the post that I'm not complaining about anything just stating facts about the way things are for some the single guys on here is all. Am NOT complaining also about not being invited to parties at all (not sure where that idea came from), if I was all well and good but I'm not going to spend loads of sleepless nights worrying about it either if I'm not I have more important things going on in my life than this place.
Ok then Stig here it is on the level. Stop being so "realistic" as you call it because you come across as a grump, a moan and a person with a bad outlook. You come across as a person who doesnt ever post anything funny but rather moreso a poster who is quick to jump in to a negative post and agree with it.
That is how you are perceived, be it correct or not (I wont make a judgement as I have never met you). If you want girls to meet you then lighten up a little, show your funny side (Im betting you have one), and for christs sake just pull back and take a day off from being so damn clinical & realistic. So you havent been lucky so far ok, but do you really think stating this fact over and over and over again is going to have girls find an interest in you?
A wise man on here once told me "Girls dont do sympathy shags". And you know what, he was so very right.
And also for the record, its not the single guys who no show that is harming your chances of meeting girls or attending parties, its your own personal approach to this site and the posts that you publish. So if you are looking for somebody to blame for your shortcomings on this site, take a trip to your bathroom sink and take a long hard look in the mirror above it.
History has shown that when someone posts a reply to you that you are ever so quick to argue. This is not a good trait, and I cant be sure, but I would imagine that girls do not find it attractive in the least. If someone offers you advice, good advice then maybe you should try taking it onboard instead of being so damn pig headed and argumentative.
Advice is good to take, I know this personally. Ive taken some advice - some really hard pills to swallow, but Im so glad I did because Ive learned that my actions and approach was creating a very bad atmosphere and a very bad image of myself in particular. Yeah some still see me as a bit of a pr#ck, but its the people that I really like and value on here that were willing to give me a second chance (Or was that third or fourth chance?), so listening and acting upon the advice I received was very beneficial to me. I suggest you do the same, should anyone be kind enough to offer you some.
And Im not looking to get into a fight with you or to go back and forth with you on this thread or any other for that matter, Im just telling you how you come across to me and probably the majority of the other site members too. Just because you pay a subscription doesnt mean you are due a meet from a girl, and before you reply saying you dont feel this way about your subscription, Im not saying that you do, so save your keystrokes.
Stig you are free to come back and argue some more on this thread, but rest assured, you will be wasting youre time, time that would be better spent on re-evaluating your approach on here, and re-evaluating how you are perceived by others on this site.
Again, I wish you the best of luck.
Quote by Sugarloaf
Ok then Stig here it is on the level. Stop being so "realistic" as you call it because you come across as a grump, a moan and a person with a bad outlook. You come across as a person who doesnt ever post anything funny but rather moreso a poster who is quick to jump in to a negative post and agree with it.
That is how you are perceived, be it correct or not (I wont make a judgement as I have never met you). If you want girls to meet you then lighten up a little, show your funny side (Im betting you have one), and for christs sake just pull back and take a day off from being so damn clinical & realistic. So you havent been lucky so far ok, but do you really think stating this fact over and over and over again is going to have girls find an interest in you?
A wise man on here once told me "Girls dont do sympathy shags". And you know what, he was so very right.
And also for the record, its not the single guys who no show that is harming your chances of meeting girls or attending parties, its your own personal approach to this site and the posts that you publish. So if you are looking for somebody to blame for your shortcomings on this site, take a trip to your bathroom sink and take a long hard look in the mirror above it.
History has shown that when someone posts a reply to you that you are ever so quick to argue. This is not a good trait, and I cant be sure, but I would imagine that girls do not find it attractive in the least. If someone offers you advice, good advice then maybe you should try taking it onboard instead of being so damn pig headed and argumentative.
Advice is good to take, I know this personally. Ive taken some advice - some really hard pills to swallow, but Im so glad I did because Ive learned that my actions and approach was creating a very bad atmosphere and a very bad image of myself in particular. Yeah some still see me as a bit of a pr#ck, but its the people that I really like and value on here that were willing to give me a second chance (Or was that third or fourth chance?), so listening and acting upon the advice I received was very beneficial to me. I suggest you do the same, should anyone be kind enough to offer you some.
And Im not looking to get into a fight with you or to go back and forth with you on this thread or any other for that matter, Im just telling you how you come across to me and probably the majority of the other site members too. Just because you pay a subscription doesnt mean you are due a meet from a girl, and before you reply saying you dont feel this way about your subscription, Im not saying that you do, so save your keystrokes.
Stig you are free to come back and argue some more on this thread, but rest assured, you will be wasting youre time, time that would be better spent on re-evaluating your approach on here, and re-evaluating how you are perceived by others on this site.
Again, I wish you the best of luck.
Sugarloaf you may have the opinion that as a grump, a moan and a person with a bad outlook and you're entitled to your opinions of course
I've gotten to know a lot of people this site as well as other sites in the past and they know that I am the complete opposite of that so I don't feel as if I have anything to worry about there.Anyways I have no interest in debating this endlessly either. Have better things to do :D
