We live in a society that is very judgmental, with very strict boundaries that can be more or less conservatory and wrong. Any person that doesn't respect the boundaries and tries to be different becomes a target of society's attention. Swingers are people who, because of their beliefs and manifestations, don't fit the regular profile society would want them to.
Many people have a wrong idea about swingers and just cannot understand the swinger lifestyle. Some people even think that the swingers are some kind of cult that does all sorts of rituals, like orgies. Of course this happens all the time when people don't understand someone's behavior and are afraid. They judge and sometimes they do it poorly. While some are so narrow minded that they can't understand a lifestyle different than their own, there are others that don't have anything against swingers, but don't participate in sexual acts that don't correspond to their beliefs. Swingers shouldn't be judged harshly because they make uncommon decisions. They don't do anything wrong and they are not a religious cult which tries to find new people and make them a part of their lifestyle. Now, more than ever (because we live in a modern world), we should be able to break away from the conservative model of the normal man and understand swingers.
The swinger lifestyle isn't very different from any other people's lifestyle. Swingers go to work, have a family, go out and do all the things considered "normal", but from time to time they engage in sexual relationships other than their regular one, meaning they have sex with other persons than the one they are committed to. For this little fact they are considered abnormal, but why is trying to get pleasure and satisfaction out of life abnormal? A lot of people nowadays are frustrated because of their sex life. And this thing doesn't just eat them from the inside, it becomes a problem for the people around that person, his or her whole lifestyle gets messed up. Even specialist say it: "a healthy sex life is very important". This way people can be more relaxed and behave better when interacting with others. No one likes a grouchy or over the hill nervous person. Through their lifestyle, swingers have found a way to have a pleasing sex life without cheating and making room for jealousy or frustrations that can degenerate. This is why society treat's them differently, because they exchange partners and when one is married it's considered cheating. According to this lifestyle as long as you have the agreement of your partner, it's not cheating. It's called swinging.
Most swingers are very healthy people and take good care of their bodies. Around 80% of the swingers are non-smokers. They also take precautions to prevent sexually transmitted diseases. All swingers try to be in great shape and healthy because after all, this lifestyle is like dating. Usually people that enjoy this lifestyle are educated people, with medium or upper income. Also, Swingers don't look to substitute their primary relationship, just enhance its pleasures.
This lifestyle is very exciting and full, so it shouldn't be judged very harshly because it offers almost everything. In comparison to other types of lifestyles, swingers don't harm or bother anyone. So if you feel the need to improve your sex and social life, then the swinger lifestyle might be the best choice for you.
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good article i came across
well done guys, great to see some balance,to some of the rubbish printed in the press lately..:kiss:
:love:I've been asked by a few people when I was in the chatroom earlier today if I'm a journalist, because I've mentioned I'm a writer. The answer is no, I'm not, but I wish I was. I wish I could write a balanced, truth-filled article to counter the impression the Sunday World gave of Swingers all being into BDSM. It's such lazy, sensationalist journalism.
The sad thing is that the real facts about swingers are so much more sensational, in a way. It takes more maturity, more security in your relationship to agree to swing than it does to be a hundred percent monogamous.
I don't have a problem with BDSM at all, even though I'm not into it. To be honest, I review some BDSM fiction and I find it remarkable. I think in BDSM the trust and understanding between the partners must be enormous.
I do have a problem with a journo who is so dense she doesn't know there's a difference between swinging and BDSM. I mean, you don't have to be into the one to be into the other, though you can practice both. That is not the impression the article gave at all.
As a pure lay person (well, I suppose I should mention I worked as a newsreader for a radio station in South Africa years ago... please don't all run away, I write romance novels now and have zero interest in journalism, that much I learned from my stint in the newsroom, it's not for me) it was not difficult at all to find a wealth of balanced information on swinging when we started researching the lifestyle to decide if it was for us. That makes it even more difficult to understand how she could have got it so wrong. I have to conclude that she was either astonishingly lazy, or she deliberately wrote something that would stir people up.
Anyone interested can pm me for links to some really informative articles available online about swinging, especially brand new people like myself who might be a bit overwhelmed by the hooha.
Boo.
The sad thing is that the real facts about swingers are so much more sensational, in a way. It takes more maturity, more security in your relationship to agree to swing than it does to be a hundred percent monogamous.
I don't have a problem with BDSM at all, even though I'm not into it. To be honest, I review some BDSM fiction and I find it remarkable. I think in BDSM the trust and understanding between the partners must be enormous.
I do have a problem with a journo who is so dense she doesn't know there's a difference between swinging and BDSM. I mean, you don't have to be into the one to be into the other, though you can practice both. That is not the impression the article gave at all.
As a pure lay person (well, I suppose I should mention I worked as a newsreader for a radio station in South Africa years ago... please don't all run away, I write romance novels now and have zero interest in journalism, that much I learned from my stint in the newsroom, it's not for me) it was not difficult at all to find a wealth of balanced information on swinging when we started researching the lifestyle to decide if it was for us. That makes it even more difficult to understand how she could have got it so wrong. I have to conclude that she was either astonishingly lazy, or she deliberately wrote something that would stir people up.
Anyone interested can pm me for links to some really informative articles available online about swinging, especially brand new people like myself who might be a bit overwhelmed by the hooha.
Boo.
Sex God
Hornydub, Thank you very much for finding and showing us that article.
Boo, Thank you for your insight and stating of the simple fact this was lazy 'gutter' journalism.
This pseudo high moral ground that this article proports to is a joke as such, and unfortounately many won't be able to read between the lines. It is clearly targeted to tick the box's and stoke the fire of people that choose to believe a certain un-informed notion they have in they're head.
as boo said, if they bothered to reseach the subject they would fine equally sensational stories of the social side of the lifestyle, the great benefits that people who partake in it enjoy, but alas no that wouldnt sell papers, and hence they have resorted, like so many times, to just playing on the fears and misconcieved opions of a few.
I'm innocent, people, it wasn't me! :scared: