Hunted down his thesaurus, Bonns wonders what all the noise is about, Clyde running around frantic chanting " I will get Padds, I will get him, I will catch him out on spelling one day"
Then Clyde remembered, Padds had given the Clyde two books for Christmas and he had not un-wrapped them.... He skuttled off in search, he had been fortunate to remember to bring them with him for a light read during the travels!
Yes he had located the presents,frantically he un-wrapped the first book
Bonns, where are my glasses? he cast the book aside and proceeded onto the next offering
ripping off the paper,,, Clyde burst out laughing "Here Bonns, take a look at this, Padds into Dinosaursus!"
Then he notices a third book, frantically he dives to the bottom of the bag... OMG Bonns, I am so happy look what the Padds got me........
But the Clyde knew that.... he was still in awe,,,, wohoooo number 3.... " Bonns me gonna kiss that Padds, fecker" Bonns slaps Clyde,,,, "Ere, not before me and btw.......
Newbie was so drunk :cheers: that all she wanted to do was show everyone her fire dance ...at least Padds wouldn't kill them with his cooking there would be no burnt sausage ... but where was Capt Thomas what was he planning and where was the Black Pearl ... and what had Thomas done with the 1 eyed snake... Clyde has a bad feeling in his...
Aside: ffs Alan, you could have found a hotter looking lady to represent me. And I'd say those marshmallows are burnt.
Padds... mentions to fellow Island members, there aint a fine looking fem on this Island that matches both Newbies and Bonns beauty.......
But, ferns are gymnosperms, perhaps Padds should be looking amongst the angiosperms (flowering plants) such as roses and orchids to find a plant to match the rare beauty of both Newbie and Bonnie.
This dawns on Padds as he exclaims, "Botany will get you everywhere!"..
after apologising to Bewbie for burning the Marshmallows...Alan realised there was a solution.. Botany
..with the help of the Brekkie Chefs ...and what had Clyde done with the lovely Bonns ... was she in a nunnery with Maria ... or on the Black Pearl with Thomas......
or has the thessaurus ] Bonns ... and Alan's stash of ....
the black pearl is out at sea but its not captain thomas that is captain of the ship tonight its been takin over by fish men bonns is tied to the mast cos the crew are horny and bonns is not playing she just wants alan but he to busy trying to put pics on the screen padds would like to save her but his boy racer car is not amphibious and would sinkm like a flash never to b seen again. so what can b done to save bonns, newbee is keping quite she feels that the compition is of her now and thomas is hers but thimas cant tell hr he has no condoms left thanks to alan making balloon puppets so with that the plot takes a new turn and the peeps dont have a clue how to follow this 1 will bonns get saved will bewbee get her evil way with thom will paddds b brave enough to rescue bonns dont know these are the questions that have to b answered its up to the next peeps to come on to start the ball rolling and save the beautiful bonns
Lady Bonns is in danger !...where is Sir Lancelot ...
Alan checks his crystal ball, who else is brave enough to help save lady Bonns... is that the Pirate Queen he could see.. she was well able to distract the Fish eyed Horny Men ..and she fancied the arse of Capt Thomas, no way was he having Newbie .. and if that failed thy would have to invoke the help of the family
if he could get them away from the how they loved to sunbath
Padds, rushes around in a panic,,, he wants to save the Bonns, he gathers all the condoms that Alan-Ball wasted making silly hats, Cats and Dogs, despite there being no children on the Island with them he gathers them all together and puts them into one the ships nets and places them it directly under where Bonns is tied, a safe landing for the Bonns the thinks, then he will whisk her away, but where is Alan?
Padds over hears a conversation from the behind the bushes, he secretly moves closer having heard Alan's voice,,, "Oh, Bewbie, Oh Bewbie!" Padds was furious,,, that fecker Alan,,, was chasing every female on the Island,,, Bonns a Damzle in distress was relying on Padds to free here, whilst Alan,,, chased Bewbies, (more about that later!)
Padds mission was to free the Bonns,,, he set his plan in motion.. he collected all the :
then clambered up the mast to free the Bonns and cut here free
Bonns announced " Ah Clyde!" Padds replied,, " I am Padds" so pushed her,,, he needed to move fast and rescue the Bonns from that Alan fecker (grin) Bonns landed on the ballons,,, Padds had a suprise for the Bonns.
But who was the suprise with the 3 balloons......
cud that really be wiggles and in a new car was she really safe ... was Padds really her saviour .... where was Clyde ... where was Alan and who was the Bewbie girl ther were all perving after...
God it was too hot to sleep. I moved to the window and opened it. I shouted Alan "for feck sake stop making that racket and let us get some sleep". The nite fell silent.i moved back towards the bed and found several naked bodies there, pausing only to check for pulses i dived into the middle of the heaving later I woke up(note to self never get into bed with a couple on their wedding nite without asking permisiion first.)Oh well maybe tomorrow the rain was falling as I lit up a smoke I pulled my raincoat higher and my fedora lower and said heres looking at you kid. The kid said fuck off perve so i did.
:taz:
So now, Clyde and Padds had to reluctantly work together to devise a plan to save Newbie, Bonnie and now the kid.
Lancelot kept his distance, waiting for the opportunity to ostentatiously dash in, save the day, and steal all the glory from Padds and Clyde!
who was this man in the full lenght black rain coat was he the 1, the orical (avalon) new the answer but tells no 1 nothin cos she not a kiss and tell type of girl. was padds realy theo??? i know i know he is white but he could have had a micheal jackson job done we dont bons salfly in the arms of padds they set about making contact with the peeps on titan peep island. by the way where did the kids come from clyde thinking to hard again was it the kids from the sound of music sent there to do our ears in with doe a dear my female dear!!! whatever they where here now and had to b put into the script more work for padds. as evening set on the island......
she though they never had this kind of drama on Lost, and that was a way bigger island, with far more sane people. But as it turns out the island was not real at all, it was all part of the Matrix. In reality they were all...
In Clydes' back garden he never stops harping on about what is at the end of it (kiss i am joking) but was there not a party too be organised? Alan had already committee too bringing the sausages. . Padds had brought Kings Crisps for Bewbies but what would the rest bring some party games perhaps? Padds. . But wait where was Lancelot? Had he got lost in a bush? Or was he indeed plotting. . . .
lancelot was indeed lost in a bush, too busy to be plotting anything. In the midst of his non-plotting he paused in his ministrations and asked himself "...who's bush am I lost in?".......
... in translation..... there was afterall a party going on.....
Padds wanted to know what happended to his boy racer car?
They had left their calling card..... was it
Was it? ..........
RGB, was as always being intentive,,,, the fooker never said Hola to Padds ( now being called Puddles and Pidds) in the chatroom,,,,,, but what of Lancelot..........
.....was it?.....Yes, it was clyde jerking off again! How many times does he have to be told about pointing that thing somewhere else? Anyway, the gang were being called together to discuss this party....many of them still in a bit of a daze after that Island Hallucination. "I want a pigeon chasing, medal polishing themed party!" exclaims Padds. "What about my puggings, then?" shouts alan but noone really hears him on account of his mouth being stuffed with fig rolls. Bonns & newbie are giggling with eachother. "we've got an idea" they both say in unison...........
hola...hola....hola......but was he too late???....
....with a gasp of relief that he had not offended his creative compadre, rgb interrupts the girls. The assembled guys groan at the audacity of the man! Did he have no respec'? "Yeh! Respec' fer de fam'ly!" grunts the ghost of Brando as he pops his spectral head through the wall. "No fig rolls for you!" smiles newbie and rgb joins Padds in the naughty corner. "As we were saying", Newbie continues, "Our party will be".........
FUN, FUN, FUN!!!!!!!!!!!
We can all get lost in the bushes on offer and have a game of "guess who's bush I'm lashing with my tongue".
There would be an abundance of sausages and puddings to be engorged.
But, what could be done with the crisps.........
......just then candlove arrived from a trip to the shop with a large sliced pan and i was apparent to everyone we'll all have king crisp learned of an evil called the bold corner and the plit of two souls being held in this God fearing place. As candy & Will walked passed the bold corner they produced a packet of fig rolls that they purcheced from the local shop and tossed them into the bold corner.......
eeps focast on the game but padds just wanted to :karaoke:the night away while newbee played her :violin: it was not going good clyde shouts lads if ya done go along with the games ill:sparring:with ya,s that got their attention we set about doing a word game first but padds fell:yawn:and newbeeto get 
from the van it was a lost cause so every thing came to a hear and clyde ran off...... 
