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Getting Started Advice from Auntie Eden

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A few guys have been asking me for advice recently on how to get started so I've put together a little something to help you. It's only my opinion and obviously lots of people will have their own ideas but I think I speak for lots of the other girls who are active on the site here.
Firstly, put effort into your profile –preferably about 10 lines long with photos. Look at others for inspiration and tailor it to represent you and your interests. It has to whet a girl's interest in you. Also, don't just put photos of different angles of your genitals. Girls are generally much more enticed by a tasteful body shot and a face pic if possible (not a deal breaker – we do understand the need for anonymity).
Secondly, try to get to know the girl. Yes, we are all on here for no strings attached sex, and yes we all have a healthy sexual appetite, but we are not hookers. The vast majority of girls on here want to build up some kind of rapport with a guy before agreeing to meet. Also, try asking a girl for a coffee to see if there's any chemistry – most of us prefer that. There are very few girls who are going to agree to meeting a complete stranger straightaway for a sexual encounter.
Before even chatting to a girl – read her profile carefully.
Then…
1. Don't ask how long have we've been on the site? Read our profile, it's on top of the page.
2. Whispering – Firstly, ask to whisper and secondly, why bother whispering something as banal as hi. Come up with something that will entice us to reply.
not ask to see our pics straightaway. After a decent length conversation you could offer to show us yours. If we accept to see them, it is reasonable then, and only then to ask for us to show you ours.
4. Do not send random friend requests. Why would we want a stranger to know when we're online etc.?
5. Don't ask as one of your first questions 'what are you into?' I'm into sex. What do you think I'm into on a swing site? Em, who are you? Do you really think I'm going to tell you the finer details of my sexual preferences.
6. Don't ask do I meet many? Again, look at the profile. I meet. I'm genuine. I'm not a messer. That's all you need to know, it's none of your business how many I meet.
7. For those of us who clearly say that we don't meet attached guys, respect that. By all means, chat in the chat rooms / be friendly but don't ask to meet us. We're not judging you, to each their own, but it's not our thing.
8. Remember that we're normal girls – yes, we are on a swing site and yes we love sex but that doesn't mean you can speak to us crudely. Good manners cost nothing.
9. Don't give up - great guys are in demand. None of them are Brad Pitt lookalikes - but rather, decent, nice, sound guys who make the effort.
Then – if you get to meet a girl for fun
1. Be freshly washed and shaved! This shouldn't need to be mentioned but alas...
2. If you're visiting a girl's house, I think it's nice to bring something; a bottle of wine, a packet of biscuits, anything. I'd never visit anyone without bringing something; it's a common courtesy.
3. While sexual health is everyone's responsibility you should have condoms and dispose of them afterwards. If you're in a girl's house ask her where she'd like them disposed.
4. Do not gossip, name drop or tell us intimate details of other women on the site. We're pretty much all friends on here and we talk - LOTS.
5. Be a gentleman at all times and you won't go too far wrong.
6. Be safe and have fun wink
I've addressed this to guys simply because there are more of them and as a girl who is having a great time on the site I know what girls are looking for. If any girls would like advice or a friendly ear by all means drop me or any of the other girls on here a mail and we'd be happy to help.
Orgasminator
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Nicely put Eden
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Go Eden!!! :jagsatwork: Now if only all the new lads read your post and allow it to sink in, I think you could successfully patent the above advice and clean up financially lol If only right? smile It definitely took you some time to topicalise (is that even a word?) & type up your post so well done you :thumbup: This OP should be a sticky thread on its own merits, then it wouldnt be lost to the forum archives within a month or so sad I think you'd make a really decent Moderator on here Eden, if you could find the time to do it. Reading your posts over the last year and meeting you in person a few times has solidified my view on this. You have my vote anyways. Look, here's me casting my vote for you >>> wave :lol:
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:thumbup: Well done Eden think that post of yours should be on the application page ;) Excellent post..
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Very good post and well thought out and there's some great advice on here & i hope that note is taken of it. Let's hope we see something similar for (some) of the ladies on this site also to keep a sense of balance
Master of Sex
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Back to the drawing board for me so !!!! ... but tanks for the impeccable advice u had me at Wash and Personal Hygiene :rose:
Warming the Bed
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Great post Eden - but i resent the part about none of us being Brad Pitt lookalikes :twisted: lol
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Great post Eden worship I've been getting mails from lots of single guys recently asking me the same thing..I totally agree with everything in your post but wud like to add just one thing..be patient guys...when a girl gives you her number dont bombard her with txts asking when are you going to meet..it will happen when it happens..we all have busy lives that sometimes get in the way of our swing lives so please respect that wink Anyway get chatting and get to a meet and greet and you will defo have a lot of fun....S4i is full of amazing people so have fun!! Happy swinging!! boink Mimi xxxx
Sexlightened
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great post eden ,and i agree with all your points..iv had a few men asking for tips and your post is excellent for helping to find their feet..hi five
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Quote by Eden
A few guys have been asking me for advice recently on how to get started so I've put together a little something to help you. It's only my opinion and obviously lots of people will have their own ideas but I think I speak for lots of the other girls who are active on the site here.
Firstly, put effort into your profile –preferably about 10 lines long with photos. Look at others for inspiration and tailor it to represent you and your interests. It has to whet a girl's interest in you. Also, don't just put photos of different angles of your genitals. Girls are generally much more enticed by a tasteful body shot and a face pic if possible (not a deal breaker – we do understand the need for anonymity).
Secondly, try to get to know the girl. Yes, we are all on here for no strings attached sex, and yes we all have a healthy sexual appetite, but we are not hookers. The vast majority of girls on here want to build up some kind of rapport with a guy before agreeing to meet. Also, try asking a girl for a coffee to see if there's any chemistry – most of us prefer that. There are very few girls who are going to agree to meeting a complete stranger straightaway for a sexual encounter.
Before even chatting to a girl – read her profile carefully.
Then…
1. Don't ask how long have we've been on the site? Read our profile, it's on top of the page.
2. Whispering – Firstly, ask to whisper and secondly, why bother whispering something as banal as hi. Come up with something that will entice us to reply.
not ask to see our pics straightaway. After a decent length conversation you could offer to show us yours. If we accept to see them, it is reasonable then, and only then to ask for us to show you ours.
4. Do not send random friend requests. Why would we want a stranger to know when we're online etc.?
5. Don't ask as one of your first questions 'what are you into?' I'm into sex. What do you think I'm into on a swing site? Em, who are you? Do you really think I'm going to tell you the finer details of my sexual preferences.
6. Don't ask do I meet many? Again, look at the profile. I meet. I'm genuine. I'm not a messer. That's all you need to know, it's none of your business how many I meet.
7. For those of us who clearly say that we don't meet attached guys, respect that. By all means, chat in the chat rooms / be friendly but don't ask to meet us. We're not judging you, to each their own, but it's not our thing.
8. Remember that we're normal girls – yes, we are on a swing site and yes we love sex but that doesn't mean you can speak to us crudely. Good manners cost nothing.
9. Don't give up - great guys are in demand. None of them are Brad Pitt lookalikes - but rather, decent, nice, sound guys who make the effort.
Then – if you get to meet a girl for fun
1. Be freshly washed and shaved! This shouldn't need to be mentioned but alas...
2. If you're visiting a girl's house, I think it's nice to bring something; a bottle of wine, a packet of biscuits, anything. I'd never visit anyone without bringing something; it's a common courtesy.
3. While sexual health is everyone's responsibility you should have condoms and dispose of them afterwards. If you're in a girl's house ask her where she'd like them disposed.
4. Do not gossip, name drop or tell us intimate details of other women on the site. We're pretty much all friends on here and we talk - LOTS.
5. Be a gentleman at all times and you won't go too far wrong.
6. Be safe and have fun wink
I've addressed this to guys simply because there are more of them and as a girl who is having a great time on the site I know what girls are looking for. If any girls would like advice or a friendly ear by all means drop me or any of the other girls on here a mail and we'd be happy to help.

BUMP
BUMP DA BUMP
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Can I add...don't try to get the girl to swing w/ you and another couple before you've even met her one to one! Grrr....
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Bump bump bump!!!! I think ALL the male members should b made read this thread and answer questions on it as proof they've read it before they can join swing !!!! (just my humble blonde opinion!)
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come back EDEN,,, we miss you wink :wink:
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Bumped to add: Lads (and ladies if it applies)...it's good manners after a meet (coffee, more, whatever) to send a text to say, "Thanks for meeting. I had a nice time." minimum and if you didn't have a nice time... you can just say, "thanks for meeting. enjoy the site.' something? anything? it's just good manners... even if you don't want to meet again or there was no connection,..it's still nice manners to do so, especially if you've played. And yes...this applies to women, too, but I'm old fashioned and won't send a text first. If I don't receive one that day or the next, I'll move on and won't meet that person again. Maybe this is just me.
Orgasminator
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And Another Bump :bounce: ;)
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Great post!! Should be read by ALL guys (&some gals)!!!