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Fifty Shades of Fu*ked up!!

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In an attempt to figure out / see for myself what all the fuss is about I've just completed '50 shades of Grey'. I'm intrigued to see what others thought of the book (particularly other guys opinions). Personally I was terribly underwhelmed. I found myself laughing when there was any play being discussed as (spoiler alert) Christian was playing with Anna. Every thing was so 'amazing' and everyone seemed to cum together etc. it was as if Mills and Boom has just moved into the soft porn market. Even the BDSM aspects were oh so perfect it seemed. I know its written as if its the opinion of a 22 year old female virgin and that's an inner monologue I (thankfully) never had to listen too but she wrecked my head! if I hear one more time about her inner feckin goddess I'll throttle her. I'm not surprised Christian spanked her. She's lucky he didn't punch her! lol (not condoning domestic violence before the abusive mails start rolling in). I get the whole oh he's rich and gorgeous and with a tortured beautiful soul I want to mother him aspect of it. That seems to 'do it' for a lot of women. In fairness when he started playing piano I nearly wept laughing (of course he plays piano!....) The BDSM scenes didn't really turn me on to be honest. Perhaps I'm too hands on with anything like that and so hearing someone else's experience doesn't do it for me. If it was more visual then that'd be a different story. I can use my imagination (and frequently do) but nah I was bored and just wanted it to end. The only reason I kept going was to see where they took the story and for the (unintentional by the author) laughs I was getting. I was thinking if it was written from Christian's point of view it'd be a much shorter story and more interesting. So here goes my stab at it..... ----------- ([i:7592d313e6]spoiler alert....) So I met this hot 22 year old through work there a while back. She seemed quite keen so I made sure to chase her a bit (cause chicks dig that sh*t). I even tried the 'treat em mean and keep em keen' angle by trying to warn her to stay away from me. Turns out she's a feckin Virgin. Nice! I'll have that thanks very much. So anyway she's into my kinky ways and doesn't mind that I've got severe Mammy issues. She seems to quite like the 'tortured past' stories actually. So I f*cked her for a couple of weeks and threw a few gifts her way and then BAM! She walks out on me! B*tch!! I don't know what I'm going to do now being a multi millionaire, tall, handsome, impeccably dressed, cultured, kinky young man that has women 'throwing' themselves at him.. I guess I'll figure something out. Now which extremely expensive suit will I wear today? Oh yeah and so my bro starts banging her best mate. Turns out she's a goer too! Nice![/i:7592d313e6] ------------- Now that's a short story worth reading! lol I hope ye can see my tongue firmly in cheek. I know the book (and the other two that I don't expect to read) has been very popular with some of the women here but quite frankly it didn't have the desired effect on me. Granted I'm not in the desired demographic. I didn't learn much from it either (which was the other reason to read it lol) but perhaps I have more knowledge than many on such matters anyway . I just couldn't take it seriously. It didn't at all sit well with me of course that I thought Christian was an over controlling and abusive nut that Anna should have ran miles to get away from but maybe that's just me... loon Ah well. So what do others think if it? Any other lads gone through / suffered it? innocent :thumbup: wink
shite read all 3 books.....such a waste of time. hence I will not be running out to see the movie..........I would have ran a knife into the pompous Mr Grey by half way through book 1.....such an annoying git nessa
I think I got to chapter 21 bored the tits of me ffs shite it was lol