I am writing the following as a member and not as a Mod,
yes believe it or not us Mods have opinions on things too!

After a rather exceptionally busy day at 'Chat towers' I have to say the amount of un solicited whispering and general nastiness I have seen on the last few days astounds me.

I mean I like to think that those that are in the chat rooms are on the whole balanced civilized individuals. but in all fairness some of the questions I seen a female cammer getting asked tonight in a directing room beggared belief, I mean had I not known better and I was a new member going into chat for the first time I would have been appalled and not so keen to return again for a while., crass and down right rude childish behavior of some left an awful lot to be desired, these same people wonder why they can't make any connections with people on the site?
I mean if you go on like a pack of sex starved teenage boys who have never had the pleasure of a womans company, nor basic knowledge of the female body your really not going to get far in the swinging world.

People that are in this lifestyle for the right carry themselves with a basic sense of respect for themselves and others, and I know for one that if you carried on with such behavior in a real world scenario be it in a public bar or at a swinging party you would be swiftly told to sling your hook. I mean think about it, do you really think that any woman will endear herself to you if the most 'seductive' thing you can utter in a chat room is 'how many fingers can you get up there' or similar. now I aint no prude but feck me there is a time and a place for the filthy chat and believe me there are plenty on here that can have the fun when it gets down to the brass tacks, surely if you stopped for a second and just think about it would you like it to be your girlfriend/wife in the same position? Yes we all know our special lady can be a right 'naughty girl' in the right mood, but believe me lads your peddling a unicycle up a greasy hill with the kind of approach I sadly see from a few in chat night after night.

Now for the facts, and bear with me, I know many of you won't read this but I think it really warrants some thought.

just because a woman shows an interest in swinging and is comfortable enough with her sexuality it does not mean she is open to abuse and because you have a horn on you will be falling over herself to take a running jump at you and help you unleash your 'tension'. Your hand and your imagination are a far more sure bet of getting your kicks.
Swingers if anyone have a far more discerning approach to sex and are far more selective, they know what they like and they sure as hell have heard all the crap lines before. Have a think about starting an actual conversation, and developing some rapport with the object of your lust. I assure you and you can put your money on this no single woman and for that part most couples will entertain any advances you make without first being sure you have a bit of decency about you and that you have some level of respect for them.

Tonight despite Numerous warnings there were a lot kicked from chat, now some may crib that this is unfair and that they did it by accident, well sorry but when you enter the room you are clearly informed about the chat rooms policy. You have to consider that the intended target of your whispers could be deep in conversation with someone else , or that they actually want to be spoken to in a civilized manner. Looking to go straight into a whisper with someone after 30 seconds of starting a conversation is a sure sign of 'Warning chat wanker' and most won't entertain you. Tell me honestly, if you were in a bar or club, and in the same time frame of making initial contact with a stranger they asked you to step out to a secluded area, I am sure you'd expect to be told to take a hike or if the shoe was on the other foot, you'd telling them that!, so why then do people think that when they come into a chartroom that a person in they're right mind, with some degree of intelligence and cop on is going to be seduced into whispers in such a short time frame.

This goes back to my initial comment about swingers being more discerning, because someone is on this site does not mean they are a 'easy lay, far from it, but believe me the effort and the time taken to get to know people on here in most circumstances is well worth it.

So the next time you log into chat, and are about to get your cock out in your hand and think you can sneek in a quick wank at the expense of someone on cam, have a good long look at yourself and remind yourself of this,
How many great sexy encounters you are depriving yourself off with some fine genuine people on here?, sure you get a quick fix from your continuing your current 'Modus operandi' but crass rude whispers won;'t endear you to anyone, why not invest that energy showing that same person you are a half decent being, and in turn you'll reap the rewards of some good old honest 'real' fun one to one, or at a party.


Right I have enough ranting done, Time for bed.

Titan79.

Wow Titan your fingers must be smoking after all that typing.

Great post.

Clara

Excellent post Titan and very well said....thank you xxxxxxxxx

Titan i have to congratualte you on what is a very good topic, this has been long over due so well done :clap: When we first joined this site there wasn't much of a chatroom and when we did eventually venture into the chatroom we were very nervous but we were met with so many friendly greetings that it made us want to log on time and time again. However in recent months we've taken a back seat from it,mainly due to unwanted whispers and idiotic, disrepectful people who can't be bothered reading our profile before chatting to us and who start a conversation off with 'hi can i see your pics please'. Now both of us will chat away the very best to anyone and we always like to think we show others the respect and manners we'd like to be shown. sure we've all sent a whisper without asking before but more often than not its the type of whisper we receive without being asked first is what we take offence to. And as for camming, absolutely no chance with the amount of abuse that cammers are faced with daily now. Just because the people on here have chosen a different life style for themselves doesn't mean they should be treated with any less respect than you would treat someone in the 'normal' world and some folk on here would do well to remember that.
So Titan thank you for bringing this topic up and i hope the people who need to read this actually take some notice of it.

Well put together Mr T it hits the nail on the head so lets hope that a majority of folk here read this and take your words in to account before whispering and being nasty to others.

Last edited by on 15th Dec 2009 - 12:40pm; edited 1 time in total

:clap::clap::clap::clap::clap::clap::clap:

mr t very well said....
but in general the conduct of a certain minority is just not acceptable..

:clap::clap::clap:well said T